WOW... Training season must be in full distance mode... sorry to you, that wonderful person who reads my blog. :o)
In the meantime, through all my swimming & biking & running wild & free, a major breakthrough has taken place: I have found in me, a true triathlete.
I did not end up racing the Rev3 Half last wkend. It's been rainy here. Like, everyday rain. I've never been shy to admit my bike handling skills are rather shameful, and yes, I am a fairweather rider. Although during a downpour I will open the garage door just to mimic a windtunnel, I consider trainer rides to be nothing more than 'getting 'er done'. So I didn't even show up to my first race of the season. No excuses other than the spring rain caused a delay in my season of about 2 months. Me + rain + 90km clipped in aero = bad for everyone's overall health and safety.
I DNSed.
But entering June without a new race t-shirt made me feel very weak. Like a runner on a long taper I was losing my mind. Feeling a bit ansy. A bit like a fraud. Certainly, it is very untriathlete of me to not have raced even a sprint yet. I feel like I'm standing here...
Ready to go, fit & fabulous, yet not even my toes are getting wet, while
this is where I truly want to be
The mind of a crazy person can be an interesting place. The mind of a complete wacko athlete can be an annoying place. I started questioning my dedication. I thought about the people who get out everyday- the swimmers, the joggers, the nordic-walkers of the world who get up everyday to train.... for nothing. I love training for it's many awesome benefits, but at the end of a few weeks I want to burst open at a start line. Why is that?
Why do some never sign up? Do they not want to start & finish anything? Do they not crave the boost of serotonin and ego that only a race can provide? Or do they know not what they are missing, because they have never tri-ed?
AHHHH.... NOOOOO.... YESSSSSS....We 'racers' are equal to a bunch of crackheads! We're chasing that fix, that moment, that rush... Worst, at the moment I was like a junkie- willing to do anything to line up along the shore...Oh my...
So I got online and thanks to Active.com and their hefty fees I got all signed up for the Pumpkinman Half Iron. A bit down the calendar, but a check off the bucket list that provided temporary relief. I now have another goal, another reason to keep training hard. I WILL & I CAN!!
That satisfaction was short lived. 2 days later I was still fighting the urge.
So what? I am indeed a junkie and most of my friends are addicts. Admitting is the first step, and although I now had an A race just 15 wks away I was honest to admit it just wasn't enough. Patience is not a virtue I was blessed with; I needed more immediate satisfaction. I also decided I really need a new bike! Certainly, a new TT bike and new race wheels will make this summer season immediately better. Right? RIGHT!!!!
Yep. More temporary fixes. More fun and much more expensive, but satisfaction none the less.
So my wacky week of quick fixes and lingering pity cost me a few pennies and a few sleepless nights. Yet it also made me realise the most important fact: race or no race, fast or not quite, ready or not, I am still a triathlete. A crazy, obsessed, in love, happy as a pig in poop AG triathlete. YAHOO!!
So now I'm mentally stable and looking for a plane ticket to Calgary so my new bike & I can go laugh through 70.3 miles.
FUN!
Train safe,